When I’m outside toasting smores with Mike and the boys, I wish for music, but when I imagine music, I imagine myself strumming easy chords on a new guitar with everyone singing happy praise music or campfire songs. Esther took my guitar as a birthday present last May, so we have sat in companionable silence these past few weeks. Sitting around a fire at night in our backyard courtyard is our newest New Mexico thing, our effort to make good memories in our new home.
Tonight Basil’s friends are outside around the fire with his phone attached to speakers. They have loud theme songs alternating with modern rock. Even Justin is outside grooving to the music.
Yesterday was Basil’s birthday and I felt bad that we didn’t do anything special. His gift from us is permission and funds to drive to Fort Worth to visit his friend over Thanksgiving break, something his older sisters were never given. Sometimes it’s good to be a young man. Mike took Basil out to a huge sushi lunch and Jonah, Basil, and I watched Terminator 6. Not a bad day.
Tonight is the real birthday party though. Yelisei, Yulia, Yulia’s friend Julianna, and Alex have been running around with Basil and Jonah. They played volleyball and badminton. Then I made them a ham, mashed potatoes, and gravy, salad, and olives dinner brought to them by COSTCO. We also had a chocolate birthday cake from COSTCO. I asked Basil to pretend to blow out the candles again for me and instead, he bit off the top of the huge number one. It was funny but not my traditional birthday picture. He also insisted on lighting the one and eight candles himself. He is an adult after all.
I’m so proud of him. His self-assurance in the way he talks and the way he moves is a sight to behold. He is the prince of the new school and holds court in the breaks with all the other boys listening to whatever random fact he says with full confidence. After his college tours, he decided to attend Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University in Daytona Beach, Florida. They accepted him and sent him a box with sunglasses and confetti. He may nap in my Calculus class of one, but he does all his homework and aces all his tests. He is having fun with his Senior Thesis which is something about “Aliens and the Meaning of Being Human.” I know he misses his friends in Fort Worth, but his life seems really great this year.
I remember the senior years of the girls as my favorite years. We spent more time together than ever so when they moved it was bittersweet. Basil hides in his room when he’s not at school. I’m thankful for the hour a day during the school week that we spend together, and we see each other at dinner and at church. I treasure the smiles that still melt my heart and the random hugs in the kitchen when Basil comes down to snack. I love him so very much.
I feel lonely without my girls. It was easier for me to spend my downtime with them. My boys check in with me during the day, but I have no interest in the car that Jonah and Justin are making out of hoverboards and cardboard boxes. I don’t want to play volleyball or ping pong, and I can’t sit still for their latest television obsession Dr. Stone.
The testosterone levels are reaching critical levels, but I can hold out until Christmas. Esther and John Ben will be here for a couple of weeks starting on Christmas Day. Xenia is happy living in Ohio even though she misses her parents and brothers. We aren’t sure where she will be after the holidays. She flies home on December 17th. Now for the big news. Sophia’s roommate passed away leaving her without a home in Fort Worth. Sophia has gone up to Washington where I have family to take a break from things and give herself time to grieve. Afterwards, she plans on moving to Albuquerque to be close to family. We will have her here by Thanksgiving!
I’ve been anxious about my children and busy with work. Aside from dancing in the Thrill the World performance of Michael Jackson’s Thriller for the Guinness World Book of records, I haven’t done anything creative. I plan on working on Syra’s Scribbles V and this week I bought some yarn to make some Christmas presents. I hope to have our Christmas Card sent out by Thanksgiving.
Please keep me in your prayers.
Syra's Scribbles 